TEST DRIVE MEME ( 026 )

[lifeaftr_mods]

Test Drive Meme #26

Hello, and welcome to LifeAftr! We're pleased that you're expressing an interest in the game. Here, you can test the waters, gauge how your character may fare in the world of LifeAftr, and even gain some in-game incentives, if you so choose.

In conjunction with our monthly Test Drive Meme, Reserves are now open! Applications will open on August 24th!

Two important notes:

1. LifeAftr's test drives take place on the island of Mu, which exists apart from the real world and possesses a dream-like quality that characters are innately aware of from the moment they appear on its shores. No need to panic or fret. Dreams are odd things, after all - and anything can happen in them. Why would anyone question where their mind chooses to wander in its sleep?

2. Due to the nature of Mu, threads in our test drive can not only be accepted as thread samples in your application, but can be accepted as game canon as well. In fact, certain choices your character makes in Mu have the potential to bear in-game consequences, largely in the form of test drive reward items.

Under the Sea
Whilst each island of the archipelago offers a variety of landscapes to explore, nothing contains as much mystery as the ocean itself. In a world that is composed predominantly of water, there is plenty that remains out of reach of any adventure. Rather regrettably, no one truly has a story long enough to uncover it all.

At the least, there's always an opportunity to enjoy what you can. Below the waves, far down on smooth sandbars and coral reefs lit up under the warming light of the sun, silence meets the ears of those who awaken. Buoyancy appears to have no effect on you whatsoever; standing comes as easily as it would on the shoreline, and breathing is surprisingly easy, as if any water that enters your mouth and nostrils simply disperses into air by the time it hits your throat. Those who attempt to swim will find the motions come as easily as if you were floating on air. And the view, of course, is nothing short of splendid.

If you happen to have picked up a few aquatic attributes - gills, scales, fins, or even a mermaid-like fishtail in exchange for legs - that wouldn't be so out of place, would it? It's really quite extraordinary. The transformation is entirely seamless in addition to painless, and can vary quite wildly. Whether it's a shift in complexion, some new tentacle appendages, or webbed feet, you'll find that your body has...shifted to accommodate your new surroundings. Even inorganic or machine-like entities will find that their machinery is now more suited for underwater exploration. The extent of this transformation will vary, as will individual appearance - the only limit is your imagination. Better yet is the utter lack of restriction in exploring this underwater playground. Brightly colored reefs hide caves and passages leading to long lost cargo, and even sunken treasure. Is that a shipwreck in the distance? Quite possibly. While this structure's descent was surely not as comfortable as your own, these ancient ruins have long since settled, ready for searching hands and eyes to uncover their secrets.

Though attempting to speak will do nothing more than produce a series of useless bubbles, venturing forth with a companion may prove very wise. Encountering a sea creature or five is simply par for the course. Most encounters are likely to be of the more peaceful persuasion, such as schools of tropical fish and kaleidoshells...but some are less pleasant.

And hungry. Be careful where you choose to linger, adventurer. Certain predators such as tigersharks are happy to make a meal of anyone who strays into their waters, and certain caves are surely home to some very large Hydrac. Free in motion as you may be, this is their home, not yours - and they will take full advantage of the ease with which they navigate their turf.

Whiskers on Kittens
The mysteries of the sea are only reflected in the vast landscapes of the archipelago proper, where thick forests hide many creatures from searching eyes for months, or even years. To those with a greater understanding of large ecosystems, the idea of creatures unknown probably isn't at all surprising - after all, there are still so many unanswered questions in regards to the creatures you do know about.

Take the fustercluck, for example. What is a fustercluck? How did it come to be? Can it truly be classified as an animal? Is it sentient, or mindless? Can it make friends? Can it breed?

Can it breed with species completely outside of its own kingdom?

Can a fustercluck produce an unholy amalgamation of cat hair and all-consuming slime?

The answer, unfortunately, is the Myancat. It appears that one of the island's resident fusterclucks has taken a liking to the player-introduced domestic cats, and the unlikely pair is, unfortunately, very compatible. Too compatible. On the plus side, this probably answers some of the questions people may have had regarding the fustercluck's sentience and status as a classifiable animal.

Less fortunately, they've had a litter of eight.

When hungry, these rotund mounds of cat faces and mewling limbs are exceptionally fierce, exhibiting all the qualities of their larger parental unit. Nothing appears to hurt them, be it sword, flame, or magic, and much unlike your standard fusterclucks, they seem to have no issues in roaming the island of Mu in search of what they want.

Luckily, what they want isn't flesh, though they'll take their unsatisfying fill of it if need be. What they truly want comes from you, deep inside, waiting to be spilled from your lips.

What they crave, above all else, is humor.

Knock knock jokes? Delightful. Puns? Keep 'em coming. A meme or two will certainly appease even the hungriest of Myans, and with every bite of humor bestowed upon them, these bulging felines will slowly shrink down, until they take on the form of a very normal, very happy cat. So put on your clown shoes and step on as many rakes as you can find, because these kitties are starving, and only you can satisfy them.

And for those wondering if these delightful creatures can be tamed...

A roll of 15 or higher will gain you a companion that will last until the dream's end.

I'd Like To Get Off This Wild Ride
On the blissful, bright island of Io, adventurers were given the opportunity to relax and enjoy themselves with a multitude of attractions designed to evoke calm, delight, and even fun. Toward the end of that island's tenure, a sprawling circus covered a significant portion of the landscape.

Mu has chosen to recreate that particular phenomenon today. Beneath the star-studded sky, sprawled out across the beaches of this dream-island, lies a deliriously colorful carnival. Massive tents of all sizes and patterns rear up into the night, illuminated with beads of brightly glowing strings of lights. All manner of amusements can be found here - from rides to games to fabulously sugary food, you're bound to find something of interest.

Be wary, however. Some of these particular attractions are more than what they appear to be. It's not all bad, of course, but it can be a dangerous roulette to play, when you end up somewhere strange and new. You could enter the House of Mirrors, for example, which initially proves to be a relatively simple, boxy maze of glassy, reflective surfaces that might, perhaps, astound children between the ages of three and five, but not much else. The further in you go, the more abstract your own reflection gets, and the larger this labyrinth seems to become. It's only when you step out the other side that you'll discover that you've drastically grown or shrank in size. You can be as tall as nine feet, or as short as a pencil's length. Proportions may or may not follow suit.

Or perhaps you end up entering the Tunnel of Love, cheap and flimsy as it appears to be. You're going to have to steer yourself through on your own in one of those battered wooden rowboats, along with whoever's unlucky enough to be your partner for this ride. You'll soon find that it's less a tunnel of love and more a tunnel of learning to depend on each other or die; the waters in this ride are infested with carnivorous eels that love to leap out and try and take a bite out of the boat's passengers. Either smuggle your own weapons onto the ride or learn how to give these foes a hearty whack with an oar - either way, you're better off watching the back of whoever's stuck on this boat with you.

If heights are more your thing, you could always strap yourself into the Ferris Wheel. Given the fact that it looks like any other ferris wheel, you wouldn't be blamed for thinking that it's an ordinary ride like any other. But once you're in one of those passenger cars and the ride starts up properly, something very, very strange will become apparent: the ride only goes up. Despite being decidedly circular, you'll find that you only ever see yourself moving higher, and never once descending to the ground. The air up here is getting rather thin, too, isn't it? You should probably find a way down, because either this ride spirals infinitely into the heavens or it breaks down and sends everyone plummeting to their deaths - and you probably don't want to find out which one it is.

Thrillseekers and daredevils might want to try their luck with the massive Roller Coaster that curls and spirals in some truly awe-inspiring twists and contortions, threaded through much of the carnival itself. It skates high into the air, features gut-wrenching drops and loop-the-loops, and operates at a truly breakneck speed. It is also, unlike pretty much any other of its kind, plagued with pests. If you've ever seen rats chewing on cables and nibbling holes in walls, these are a little bit like that - only these ones are a good deal larger, and happen to be capable of gnawing through the steel beams and supports that are keeping this wild ride together. Rodents of Unusual Size apparently exist in this reality, so you'd better either find a way to get off the coaster or clear these darn R.O.U.S.'s off your tracks, because if left unchecked, they'll put a stop to the ride for you...prematurely.

All that being said, there's nothing preventing you from just outright avoiding all those lures. You could settle for playing a probably rigged game of darts, or trying to win a giant stuffed animal in a claw machine, or plain making yourself sick on fair food. That's probably safer than risking any of those deadly contraptions, right?

---

LOGS ● OOC ● STORIES ● MAIN NAVIGATION

( CODED BY BOOTYCALL )

Comments

adam young ( good omens ) ota

[goshdang]

i. cat experiments.

[It's a good thing Adam's dreaming, and it's an even better thing that the dream isn't of his usual sort. Adam has an unfortunate tendency to hear the whispers of Hell in his head when he dreams. He wasn't sure if he still would now, but so far what he's seen seems to be fantastical in a very practical way, which is perfect for his tastes.

For example, he and Dog, his mixed terrier of a Hell Hound, have happened upon what might have been a cat's answer to Adam's beast, if Adam hadn't decided he'd rather have fun with his dog than go about bringing hellfire down upon the world with him. It's like someone's taken every cat in the world and jumbled them up together into... well, not one cat, it seems, but certainly one form.

Dog doesn't seem too impressed with it, regardless. He's currently growling at the cat-goop, while Adam tries to hold his leash tight so that he doesn't go after it. As the catmalgamate undulates across the roots and green of the forest floor, Dog starts to bark at it.]

Down, boy! Down! You know you're not meant to be goin' after cats.

[Dog is normally very obedient to whatever Adam says. That might be because they're meant to be together. Or, it could just be because when Adam decides something is true, it is true.

Either way, Dog is apparently much too riled up by the news that cats can come in All form. He's pulling against his leash so hard that Adam is left dragging his feet against the grass, furrowing his brow at his pet.]

ii. it's getting closer.

[Being from a very, very small town in England, just a few kilometres away from the road connecting Oxford and London, Adam has never actually encountered a carnival. He hardly goes to the city; his father is very much a homebody, and his mother is normally the one to accompany him when he does. Which means he would normally be going out to accompany her on errands.

Of course, Adam is familiar with the concept of a carnival. One even appeared in a story he wrote once, though he mostly guessed at what one might be like, and even then it only appeared so that the cowboys could fight the clowns.

This one seems like it has a lot less clowns in general. The cotton candy is very good, though, so that makes up for it. One of the stall workers had even procured a paper bowl to put water in for Dog at his request.

As he sits on a bench and haphazardly stuffs sugary pink fluff into his mouth, he's eyeing the Ferris wheel. This would be a lot more fun if his friends were here to ride it with him, but Adam supposes if he really needed them, he could just dream them up too.]

ii

[demonicmiracle]

[This is Crowley's first experience with this whole dreaming nonsense, but he's had the concept explained in decent enough detail, so while he doesn't like it all that much, he's not too worried. Just got to get through it until whenever his body decides to wake up. Should only be a few hours, really.

The last thing he's expecting to see is the Antichrist and his literal Hellhound, sitting on a bench eating candy floss. Crowley stops a small distance away, winces, considers just backing off and leaving this whole mess for someone else to deal with. Hell makes him nervous. Adam scares him. But —

Maybe he owes the kid, for the whole business with trying to get Aziraphale to shoot him.

With a sigh, Crowley starts walking again, coming over to unceremoniously sit down on the bench beside Adam.]

Alright, kid?

[goshdang]

[Adam, of course, recognizes Crowley. That was what he was called, right? They'd only met the once, but it was a very lasting impression that had been left on him.

Mostly, he knows that Crowley was one of the ones who wanted to stop the world ending, which means, if Adam is on anyone's side, and Crowley is on anyone's side, that probably means they're on the same one. Even if Crowley is from Hell; people can't really help where they're from, Adam thinks.

So he looks up as the demon sits beside him, and Dog finishes off lapping up his water so he can immediately trot over to sniff at the new person's knees. Dog probably remembers what "demon" smells like, but a lot has happened to Dog recently, so he might just be trying to figure out where he remembers this smell from. Or something. We can't know what a dog thinks.]

Alright. What are you doing at a carnival?

[demonicmiracle]

[Crowley's never been much of an animal person, most of them seem to have a sixth sense for what he is and respond accordingly, but Dog is, technically, from sort of the same place he is, and they've both been given a chance to be something different. So he's feeling a bit like, sentimental or something, as he lightly scratches behind Dog's ears.]

What, a demon can't enjoy a carnival? [It's a flippant answer, but he follows it up with a proper one.] I don't think I'm here at all, really. It's a dream, you're probably asleep in your bed in Tadfield and I'm stuck on a bloody island in another universe, I wouldn't worry about it too much.

[Crowley that's...... not....... reassuring.]

[goshdang]

[Dog might actually be more likely to get territorial around an angel than he would around Crowley, given their shared origins. Mostly he just gets territorial around Earth animals, though. And he does enjoy the ear scratches, which helps him finish sniffing with an apparent approval and a few licks of the demon's fingers.

Adam frowns a little when Crowley explains, but not for the reasons one might expect. He already knows it's a dream, and he's certain he's asleep in his own bed at home right now, and he's not too surprised at Crowley being in another universe. Adam's read about parallel dimensions, so it sounds about normal to him.

It's just that this is his first time having a normal dream for the past few weeks or so, only now it's not quite so normal at all, is it?

But after considering that for a little bit, Adam seems to accept it after all. For one, the dream is otherwise normal and pleasant, and for two, Crowley isn't exactly here to encourage him to destroy humanity.]

So you came to my dream to see the carnival, did you?

We should ride the roller coaster, then. Come on.

[His first thought was the Ferris wheel, but he's changed his mind exactly one second before saying so. He might have been able to go with Dog otherwise, but now that someone else he knows is here, he can set Dog somewhere else and do the more exciting one.

And, without questioning whether Crowley actually wants to come along, he simply gets up and tugs Dog's leash to start following him. Congrats, you are now a temporary member of Adam's gang.]

[demonicmiracle]

[The brilliant thing about children, more so even than most humans, is how willing they are to just accept whatever weirdness gets thrown their way. Probably something about their worldview being far more flexible than an adults. Adam seems happy enough to keep treating this as a chance to visit the carnival, and Crowley figures there's no need to get into things like the Storyteller and Mu and whatever all that nonsense is about.]

Sure, why not, let's go with that.

[That's probably a bit weird, but maybe Crowley can just say that he wanted to check up on Adam, make sure he's alright after everything, if the kid questions it.

For now, though, apparently they're going on a roller coaster. Crowley stares after the boy for a split-second, before he sighs and gets to his feet, catching up in a few easy strides.]

These things looked different last time I was on one.

[It was like...... the early 1920s the last time Crowley felt the need to go on a roller coaster. It sort of pales in comparison to flying, and he doesn't like being in something moving fast that he isn't in control of. But he can deal with it. Probably smart to keep the Antichrist happy, even if he's mostly human now.]

miles morales | into the spider-verse | ota

[sparkour]

carnival stuff.

[ 1. house of mirrors.

Okay, he really thought this lucid dreaming thing would come with a little more personal control of the situation. Call Miles old-fashioned, but it feels like a waste of time knowing what's going on otherwise.

He makes his way through the house of mirrors with the idle fascination of, well, a New York middle schooler going through what seems like a pretty tame house of mirrors. It only starts getting weird after he's been walking around it for a while. Weirder reflections. Weirder tingling something-bad-is-going-on-here feelings with no immediately identifiable source.

He squints up at an especially distorted mirror as he walks past it. Are the dozens of reflections a whole thing tying back to the other realities? Is this... symbolism? Is he processing? ]

I should not be psycho-analyzing shady carnival mirrors.

[ When he finally gets through to the other side and he's small enough to be his own action figure, he does what any right-minded, unsupervised, lucid-dreaming superhero would do. He says a very loud swear.

From there, Miles can be found climbing and trying to tiny-parkour his way up to higher vantage points, be it the counters of stalls or the sides of tents. He can also be found back inside the house of mirrors, because logic dictates to him that going back through will somehow reverse this situation. It might. Probably.

Regardless of where he is, he's got a full arsenal of "hey, careful!"s at his disposal for all the times he nearly gets stepped on. ]


[ 2. ferris wheel.

This is literally so dumb. This is the worst. Miles is lucky in that he doesn't have a problem with heights. He's actually pretty good with those nowadays. He does have a problem with being on a ferris wheel slowly spiralling its way into infinity, oxygen or no oxygen. So that's not ideal. It doesn't take too long to catch onto that bit, at least. There's time to act.

He swings back to there being good things about knowing he's dreaming: he probably won't really die, sure, and yeah, it's great that this ferris wheel isn't all that crowded, but most importantly? Keeping his powers a secret doesn't matter for a damn. Like, it's a dream. It doesn't even matter. He has web shooters and he knows how to use them.

Which is why there's a kid confidently climbing his way around from seat to seat. So maybe the spinning is making him a little nauseous. This job comes with risks. ]

How's it going? [ Miles both looks and sounds like he wants to sound cool right now. The fact that he has to keep shifting on his feet to keep his balance takes away from the intent. ] You want a ride back down to the ground? 'cause that's where I'm heading.

[ Does that sound ominous? He didn't really think about it before he said it. ]

Oh, uh-- like an actual ride. You're gonna have to trust me, but I promise it's splat-free. I'm pretty good at what I do.

[ Not to brag or anything. ]

jack frost | rise of the guardians | ota

[on_thin_ice]

( i. myancat )

[ eldritch abomination? pssh. that's nothing. jack is the guardian of fun. and this? this is right up his alley. all it takes is a little snowflake and a small area of snow for the myancat to frolic in, wiggling all . . . who knows who many limbs there are, jack stopped counting, purring away. ]

That's it, kitty. And after that, we'll go prank some kids.

( ii. ferris wheel )

[ jack is watching the ferris wheel go up and . . . up . . . and up. and there's definitely a few frightened faces up there. calling the wind, jack flies up there, concerned. ]

Hey. Hey, it's gonna be okay. I can bring you down — No you can't see me, can you?

[ what is he supposed to do here? ]

( iii. wildcard )

[ got a different prompt you’d like to do? drop it here. ]

[boogerman]

[For pity's sake, can't an honest boogeyman enjoy a bunch of helpless, frightened people trapped on a ferris wheel without a snowflake coming along to pester him?!

Ugh.]

I can see you, Frost. Now do me a favor and go be unseen somewhere else!

[on_thin_ice]

[ jack crouches on the rails with a smirk. ]

Really? Resorting to ferris wheels now? Oh, how the mighty have fallen.

[boogerman]

It's effective, isn't it? Look at them, going up and up--why, it could be endless for all you know. And there's nothing you can do about it.

[He didn't do it, but shhh don't tell anyone!]

[on_thin_ice]

[ he swings his staff idly, not thrown off. ]

Sure, I can. Don't forget, I have a few friends of my own.

[ like the wind. ]

donna noble | doctor who

[oispaceman]

1. myan cat.

[ Donna looks away for two seconds and this happens. Whatever this is. Because hell if she knows what, exactly, it is.

She's seen a lot of strange things, both terrible and wonderful. She's fallen on a lot of hard times. A weird fleshy cat mound is on a level all its own.

(A thing like that, she hopes it doesn't hurt it just to exist.) ]

Ooh. Hello. [ ????? do they language? Can it be reasoned with? All these questions and more on Doctor Who. ] Good... kitties?

[ Someone help get on the humor level here, because she has no way of knowing that's the answer and this is an extremely weird time right now. ]


2. tunnel of love.

[ She goes on the tunnel of love. Which she tries not to think about all that much. It's a dream, isn't it? Dream tunnel of love, maybe a dream man will turn up or something. Doesn't hurt to try.

Doesn't work, really, but there are worse things out there than going through a flimsy carnival ride with a stranger and having a laugh about it. Out in the universe and time and space and all that, she's made friends with less. And with more, in terms of life-threatening terror.

So, you know, the first evidence of carnivorous eels leaping out of the water to try to eat passengers is only half a surprise. Something harmless turning out to be dangerous and deadly? Wow, go figure.

Her brain really isn't all that creative, is it? ]

You have got to be joking.

[ Perks of sharing this ride with Donna Noble, super-temp: she'll have you know she's a sweet treat, a fucking delight to be around. She is fully ready to poke fun at a crappy carnival ride setup with any stranger who doesn't seem to be a genuine jerk.

She also has a knack for absolutely grand-slamming eels with wooden oars that says she's had to deal with nonsense like this quite a lot. She will defend the hell out of her boat pal. And if her boat pal is a woman or a kid, she'll do it with little to no shouting directly at them. She will become their first line of oar-based defense. ]

Can't even go to a flippin' carnival without something trying to kill me!

[ Her wrath is righteous and therein lies her power, obviously. ]

1

[demonicmiracle]

[So far, there isn't much in this universe that Crowley is fond of, but Mu would have to take the cake for just being absolutely awful. Take, for example, whatever the fuck that thing is. He's just trying to mind his own business, go for a stroll in a dream that seemed relatively peaceful to start, and now he's stumbled on some poor woman being accosted by a sentient pile of cats.

Crowley shoves his hands into his pockets, keeps a safe distance.]

I wouldn't, if I were you, most of the things here tend to think humans are on the menu.

[boogerman]

They aren't here. Just you, me, and people who tend to splatter when you drop them. Go on, don't let me stop you, it'll be hilarious.

[He didn't do this. He's not strong enough to pick a real fight at the moment. He looks like shit. But it's true, this is funny as hell.]

catte

[vagabone]

[Don't look at him, the skeleton man, because he has no answers. He can barely stand to look at the thing, feeling like he'd be queasy if he had a stomach. Gross. Bad. The worst.]

Yech. I have no idea. Dios mío, that's too much cat even for the kid.

[Pray Ren doesn't see it!!!]

mira | oc | ota, game memories intact

[antepone]

hatsune miku intensifies
[ ... yeah, okay, she isn't sure why she's surprised this happened. The giant cat abomination is pretty on brand for the islands, and as she looks up at it, she isn't sure what it wants. ]

This is impawssible.

[ She doesn't mean for it to be a pun, but apparently she puts enough emphasis on the second syllable to make it seem like one. The Myancat shrinks a little, and Mira blinks. ]

I guess that was... purrfect?

[ It shrinks down a little more, and she lets out a little oh of realization. ]

So that's what you want...

carnival carnage
[ Alright, this is... well, she hasn't been to a carnival in years. It doesn't look all bad, but there are places that she outright avoids because they look dangerous. And honestly, she isn't surprised too much. She's grown wary of a lot of things on the islands, even in spite of all the good; what she does gravitate to is the food and games.

She's just lost another try at a ring toss, but she doesn't seem too put out. ]

I know it's all rigged, but... It's still really fun.

[thermalwind]

Well, you're the cat's meow today. [It shrinks down a little more as someone steps out of the shadows. Keith's dark hair is clipped to the back of his head instead of in a ponytail or a braid. The expression on his face is slightly resigned.]

Hey. This purrday for a ponytail or can I join in? [He'd seen it shrink and bad jokes? He can do that.]

[antepone]

Keith!

[ Ah, look at that. She brightens up when she sees him, but the Myancat must be sated. It's shrinking down, little by little, but they still have some way to go... so a proper reunion must wait. ]

I'd love to have you. This'll be a tail to tell for the rest of time... and it won't be clawful at all.

Purrobably.

[thermalwind]

Pawful. [He laughs and eyes the monstrosity of a cat. all the faces on its body make the hairs on the back of his neck rise in dread. It seems harmless but so did the Lorbies.]

So how did you meet your furiend? I haven't seen one of these befur.

[antepone]

[ Luckily their abomination is shrinking! It's almost a normal cat now. ]

Furtunately, I think they exist only on Mu... Or, um, Mew? [ The Myancat meows happily and shrinks a little more. ] I have a feline they might be staying here too.

... Mew-be. It might be a cat-astrophe if they purrive on Enso itself.

[on_thin_ice]

Oh, I wasn't talking about the Guardians. C'mon, Pitch. I have other powers, you know.

[thermalwind]

Yeah? I have my wolf. [And a lot of Paladin armor including his fiancé’s. He keeps that thought to himself. Keith crosses his arms and looks up at the sky.]

Guess we all need a purrsonel friend. Makes for a better tail. [The cat has been steadily shrinking and Keith lets out a sigh.] Meowssed you. It’s been a little hair raising? Does that work?

[He peers at the abomination with a raised eyebrow.]

im putting in a cheat code to clip through most of the facetwin stuff 2019

[oispaceman]

[ There's no getting around how similar the voice is. Not completely the same, but more than enough to have Donna double-taking. What starts as a Donna-brand recognition level in her expression-- that is to say, a sarcastic and mildly irritated but in a Fondish Way level-- makes some rapid real-time turns until she lands in the vicinity of both confused and indignant about it.

Thing is, she knows the Doctor. Better than she knows anyone else, by this point.

That's not him by a long shot. Same face, same toothpicky legs, the voice. Different style. Different energy. As in, less of it in general. Mysterious mound of mushy cats out in the wilderness? Oh, he'd be all over it. He'd think it's brilliant. He'd poke at it until it said something really sad or until they had to run for their lives, because he doesn't know the meaning of a safe distance. All this recognition with nowhere to go.

If this is a dream, it could clearly use some fine-tuning. If it's not a dream, then this is exactly her luck, isn't it. Who asked you, palette-swapped leggy man!!! Wow! ]

What, like that makes it special? Show me a planet where most things don't think that.

[ The myan cat has paused. It's probably wondering if this is going to turn into a bit right before its... many, many eyes. ]

that's very fair and valid of you

[demonicmiracle]

[Crowley opens his mouth to respond, does that thing he does where a bunch of useless syllables come out — because she has a point, really, the first thing humans did on Earth was nearly get eaten by a cat, funnily enough — before he settles on actual words.]

Well, I mean, sure. That doesn't mean you have to go about getting eaten by it. Must be a horrible way to go, all those mouths.

[He's yet to actually meet a fustercluck, so he doesn't know...... the specifics on how it works, but there's nothing about the situation there that seems positive at all. Which really is modus operandi for this place. It's the worst holiday he's ever had, honestly.]