aftr_ooc | TEST DRIVE MEME ( 011 )

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TEST DRIVE MEME ( 011 )

Test Drive Meme #11

Hello, and welcome to LifeAftr! We’re pleased that you’re expressing an interest in the game. Here, you can test the waters, gauge how your character may fare in the world of LifeAftr, and even gain some in-game incentives, if you so choose.

Remember that Reserves will open on May 17th, and Applications on May 24th!

Two important notes:

1. LifeAftr's test drives take place on the island of Mu, which exists apart from the real world and possesses a dream-like quality that characters are innately aware of from the moment they appear on its shores. No need to panic or fret. Dreams are odd things, after all - and anything can happen in them. Why would anyone question where their mind chooses to wander in its sleep?

2. Due to the nature of Mu, threads in our test drive can not only be accepted as thread samples in your application, but can be accepted as game canon as well. In fact, certain choices your character makes in Mu have the potential to bear in-game consequences, largely in the form of test drive reward items.

Damn It, Todd
The island breeze is cool and pleasant, temperature-wise. The sun is beaming cheerfully overhead, and the waves lapping up against the beach are a crystalline aquamarine. The place may as well be a postcard, with how picturesque it is: from the thick copses of palm trees to the soft white sand, it's a truly gorgeous, becoming setting.

It makes up for the chaos of its inhabitants.

Mu has adopted what promises to be a highly frustrating backdrop for its dreamers, this fine evening. The island looks normal enough, seems normal enough, but for whatever reason, the physics and general behavior seems oddly...glitched.

We don't just mean in the general sense, either. At random intervals, you may find yourself being launched several feet in the air by an invisible abuse of physics, or clipping through trees at breakneck speeds. Maybe you're walking around several feet above the ground, or your hands are much larger than the rest of you. Regardless, the possibilities are virtually endless and promise to be, for the most part, quite harmless for those afflicted - just very annoying. Whether you're swimming in the air, repeating the same lines of dialogue over and over again, or stuck halfway through the ground, it's not clear how one is meant to undo these glitches once they set in.

You could always try helping each other! Though that may simply make things worse; who can say if these glitches might bleed into one another and complicate things even further?

(Oh, and they do. They absolutely do.)

This is Dragonna Suck
When you wake in a lovely, tranquil woodland, it perhaps seems too good to be true. The trees are dense with canopies flowering overhead, and the grass has formed a thick, plush carpet on the forest floor. There's the sound of birds chattering happily in the branches, and the rustle of forest creatures in the undergrowth. That's around the time that a loud, angry roar splits the silence, and something very large and very green barrels into the clearing you occupy with large, barklike claws.

This, dear adventurers, is a rootwyrm. While undeniably draconian in appearance, the effect is offset by the fact that the rootwyrm's skin is more akin to the texture of bark than it is scales. One can generally discern the age of these creatures by counting the number of rather stubby legs that support its ample middle - the youngest will only have two, while the oldest will have as many as twelve.

Rootwyrms move slowly, thanks to the turtle-like shell that sits astride their back in lieu of wings, but they make up for this by hitting quite hard in a fight. Instead of breathing fire, rootwyrms spit a caustic, stinging acid if they can't get close enough to their prey, though they'll be more than happy to try and dispatch you the old-fashioned way: with an extremely large set of reptilian jaws.

Did we mention they don't like trespassers? And that you're standing square in the middle of their territory?

You're Pollen My Leg!
The open spread of the grasslands allows for a clear view of the cloud-scudded sky. This particular setting is that of a meadow, vast and seemingly infinite, hosting a sweeping expanse of rolling hills. The wind's rippling over the fields of rich green and buff-colored grass lends itself to the impression that the hills are in constant motion, as if you're standing in the middle of a verdant ocean.

Naturally, such is not the case. As you roam the landscape, you'll probably notice the dollops of color sprinkled here and there: flowers growing in bright clumps amidst the tufts of grass.

They're not ordinary flowers. Why would they be? They're in full bloom, meaning that thick spores of pollen have begun to waft freely into the air. Careful not to draw too close, because this pollen, when inhaled, ingested, or otherwise interacted with in any nonspecific capacity, will have a variety of...side effects, depending on which particular plant's spores you've just unwittingly imbibed.

There are five variants you may encounter in your dream-travels, each of which will have a different result, depending on the color.

[ ♆ ] Blue flowers will induce short-term amnesia and general confusion. Forgetting your sense of identity, difficulty discerning the difference between right and left, and an intense sensation of vertigo are all common side effects.

[ ♆ ] Red flowers will make you intensely and inconsolably angry at just about everything. You know that guy who chewed gum behind your ear that one time? Fuck that guy! That person over there, with the yellow shirt? Fuck their shirt! Yellow is a stupid color, and you're stupid for wearing it!

[ ♆ ] Green flowers will induce a loss of one important sense - sight, smell, taste, touch, or hearing - though loss of powers is also known to have occurred.

[ ♆ ] Purple flowers will induce silence. We hope you aren't very talkative by nature, or that you can communicate exclusively via rude hand gestures, because now you can't speak at all.

[ ♆ ] Orange flowers will fill you an indescribable terror regarding just about everything. The slightest motion, the most innocent hello, the most harmless small animal - all will tap directly into every primal fight-or-flight response to danger you have.

These status effects can and will stack, by the by. Maybe start up a little game of pollen bingo, and see how many fanfiction tropes you can rack up in one day.

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this is dragonna suck

[One might think, in a battle between a dragon and a skinny ass elf, the dragon would be the loudest person in this encounter. However, that certainly wouldn't be the case here. Anyone coming across this combat will see the rootwyrm turning itself in circles, attempting to grab at a person that seems to be on it's back, hanging onto it's antlers while whooping and hollering the whole time. Groundside, a large dog can be seen trying to keep pace (and also not be stepped on), circling the beast and barking the entire time.

The woman on the beast, however, doesn't seem to care what kind of damage or noise this is causing, removing one hand from the beast's antler to retrieve a small sword from her back, starting to slam it into it's neck.]

You can attack me, that's fine, but I draw the line at stabbing my fuckin' dog! Fight me you sentient shrub!

[She does seem to be largely enjoying herself, though. Maybe this is her idea of a good dream.]

you're pollen my leg; purple

[In sharp contrast to her above encounter, this one absolutely bites.

She was doing fine avoiding the flowers up to now, but the purple she had wanted to investigate- most dark flowers have some kind of harmful pigment in them, and if she's gonna be stuck here, she needs new poisons, stat. Of course, the second she kneels down next to them, the wind blows a faceful of pollen straight at her, knocking her onto her back in a fit of coughing. And worse than that, when she sits up, she can't seem to yell at all.

Her dog circles her and starts padding off to check the perimeter, and Amdir tries to yell after him- nothing. Clapping still works, but he doesn't seem to be receptive to that, either. So she just sort of flops on her back and starts banging all of her limbs on the ground in the world's dumbest looking temper tantrum. She may be in her mid 20s, but right now, she looks like she could be five.

If not for the times she stops to flip off the flower patch, that is.]

[Between the trees, two yellow, piercing eyes have trained themselves on the scene of complete and utter chaos before them, content to simply watch rather than step in. The wolf they're attached to is large and black, and seems oddly calm in the wake of this dragon's stampeding through the forest.

She steps back to avoid a swinging tail, but otherwise remains still.]

[She's doing pretty well, or like, as well as you can be when you're 1v1ing a wood dragon as a friggin' rogue. Well, 2v1 if you count the dog. Still, this thing bucks like hell, and one misstep means getting tossed off and pretty much right next to her in a heap. Amdir sits up quickly, shaking her head and pushing some loose pieces of hair out of her face. The mabari is still sprinting, running a wide berth to get over to her and stop this thing from just eating her while she's down.

She blinks, a little dazed, before turning her head to meet the wolf's eyes, jumping just a bit in a sieze of worry.]

Oh, shit-- hey, hey, this isn't your huntin' ground! If you want the body you can have it, but if ya bite me it's gonna be a scrap!

[She doesn't even know this is a person. She's literally just threatening a random ass animal with just words.

[The wolf's mouth opens, and for a moment it may seem like she's about to snarl or take a strike at Amdir, but she closes her mouth and tosses her head in a sort of shrug-like motion. If Amdir takes a close look at her eyes, it might almost seem like she's smiling.

She then turns away from the elf and darts toward the dragon, launching herself onto it and biting at its neck viciously.]

[She raises a blade, prepared to start this fight, but it ends as quickly as it began-- and then starts fighting for her? Amdir squints, but it's not until Barkspawn looks at the wolf and gives it a friendly growl that it snaps into place.]

Oh shit! Morrigan! Yes!

[She pumps a fist into the air as she scrambles to her feet, running back towards the dragon while hollering the whole time. The rootwyrm, meanwhile, starts thrashing wildly, attempting to shake her.]

Could totally use some magic backup right now! Like, all of it, actually! We're down people who can actually take hits-- aah, you get it, you know what's up.

[She's just gonna focus on stabbing this thing's tail instead while she's got the front. This is gonna be way easier as a tag team.]

[Morrigan clamps down on the rootwyrms neck, trying to keep hold, but its flesh gives way and the wolf is sent flying off, landing on her back. She quickly jumps back onto her feet, though, and spits out the plantlike bits of dragon that she took with her almost victoriously. It'll be feeling that one.

She then transforms back into her human self, and immediately casts a fire spell, sending a cone of flame blasting out toward the rootwyrm. Thankfully, since Amdir is on the other side of the dragon, she's not in danger of catching fire.]

Watch yourself!

[Morrigan warns her all the same.]

[She doesn't even blink when Morrigan gets thrown, but whoops a loud holler as the fire spreads out, stabbing her swords down into it's tail to keep it in place. Obviously, she doesn't have the strength to keep it there, but it does stop it from a sudden dodge as the beast alights in flame.]

Yeah, yeah, I see you!

[As if she hasn't run around mildly on fire before. It's fine. It's so fine. The rootwyrm hollers, ripping it's tail up and shaking her swords off with it, and Amdir grabs them back as it stumbles towards the treeline. It's about then she realizes something.]

Oooooh shiiiiiit, this is a forest, it's gonna catch the trees and we're gonna be fucked!!

[The dog circles back, trying to get in front of the dragon to push it back, but it doesn't seem to be responding to his barking as a distraction anymore. Regardless, Amdir surges forward, trying to think of a way to kill this thing quickly.]

Do you think me a fool!?

[Like, come on, Amdir, Morrigan didn't have greatness thrust upon her in the form of ancient magics yesterday.

You know what else plants don't like? Ice. We're going full Pokemon in this binch. Morrigan rushes forward to get back in range and follows up her cone of flame with a cone of cold, freezing it solid and entirely snuffing out the fire.]

Hold your applause, please. We don't have all day; shatter the beast.

[It's not you, Morrigan, Duncan just picked the world's biggest idiot to lead the revolution. Should've left once he figured out the woman he was looking for was gone, but Amdir gets... something done, if not the job. Thankfully, Morrigan is putting in a great party carry, and she scurries up a nearby tree because this is going to look amazing, just wait.]

I got it, I got it, watch this!!!

[She jumps off the branch with a spin, sword in each hand, and strikes both through the head in a spectacular slash. Sure enough, it explodes into ice, and while she lands a little wobbly she's on her feet in just a minute before looking over her shoulder at Morrigan.]

Okay, landing was a little off, I'll admit, but that was at least a 9, 9 and a half.

Don't sell yourself short. 'Twas a solid victory, if a little haphazard. With a full party, we'd have felled it much faster.

[She's not counting the dog. She never counts the dog, as persuasive as it attempts to be.

Anyway, yeah, magic is cool, you don't need to tell Morrigan this, she knows she's the MVP of basically any encounter.]

I'd ask what you were doing out on a forest island fighting dragons, but I'm honestly not surprised.

[She'd hoped to be a little more under the radar so soon after dipping out before the whole pomp and circumstance of ceremony and what have you after the Archdemon was defeated, but, well, they're both seemingly in an unfamiliar place and she knows she can rely on the Warden.

Up to a point. She's familiar territory in a sea of unknowns, is really the better way to describe it.]

Hey, we have a party. I mean, we're down like, Sten, but.

[Dog counts!! Don't be mean!!]

And look, to my credit, I have no idea how I got here. Or where this is-- I don't know if that's better, actually? But I didn't do this on purpose. This wasn't like, me being stupid and wandering into the Fade or something.

[... WAIT, THAT'S AN IDEA]

Wait, is this the Fade? I wouldn't know if it was the Fade, right?

The Fade houses demons and spirits, not dragons, and I would see through any demon's illusion. Though 'tis not unlike the Fade.

[She had wondered the same thing herself when she first realized she was here, the dreamlike quality of her surroundings matching up with the typical mage experience of the Fade. But that was quickly ruled out after some exploring as a wolf.

She sighs, bringing a hand to her forehead. She's no fool, weaker for her love for the elf; she never expected a reunion with the Warden, had fully intended on staying out of her way for good once they both had what they needed. The archdemon slain, the dark ritual performed, and Morrigan gone without a trace, never to return.

It was supposed to be clean. Why are things never clean?

(Well, the answer to that is usually Flemeth, but Morrigan had hoped her death, if temporary, would buy her a little more time than this.)]

There are places beyond the world and beyond the Fade. Before you ask, I do not know how we would have arrived to one of them. Someone interrupted me while I was trying to gather answers.

[Sorry Morrigan, this Warden is just a little behind right now. She's busy worrying about the Archdemon eating everyone, not anything past that. While she's past the worst experience ever in the Fade, it's only one call, though she remembers that she shouldn't be able to figure out if it is the Fade without being a mage, so. It's still a little confusing. She continues to be not very smart.]

When were you doing that? Was that what was in your mom's book we got?

[She did need to follow up on that.]

Look, it's not my job to deal with freaky magic stuff, and anything that involves sleeping in one place and waking up nearly alone somewhere super different hits that for me. So if you don't know where we are, I'm not lovin' that. Do you have any ideas at least?

Among other things.

[Yeah, no. Morrigan's not letting on what's in her mother's grimoire, Amdir. Good fucking luck getting a straight answer from her.]

My thought is we may have stumbled across something that linked Thedas or the Fade to a world beyond. A world with qualities of the Fade, certainly, but still not the Fade. We'd have to find the artifact or being responsible before any questions are truly answered.

[A sigh. A truly beleaguered one.]

I suppose that means we must travel together again, if you've any hope of finding answers.

Edited (icon) 2018-07-09 01:06 (UTC)

[Damn, just tell her a little bit. But the more she listens, the more she's getting a little bit behind. And as much as Amdir doesn't like to admit when she's wrong, she also likes to keep her story straight.]

Okay, okay, I'm behind on all of this- really I am- but hang on. What are you talking about travel together again? We were just-- doing that. We were in the, the dwarf underground whatever, dealing with Shemface Mcprinceman and leaving them with the old man in charge. You didn't go anywhere.

[She's already getting a little ahead of herself now, trying to figure this out.]

Did you disappear? Like just fuck out when I didn't notice or something, because I wouldn't blame you so much for not wanting to be in the Deep Roads more because forget it. But I'm pretty sure you were right there.

[Morrigan stares blankly at Amdir for a moment, takes a breath, and walks her Warden through it.]

We must be dealing with some form of time magic, then. Wonderful.

[She adjusts her hair and leaves her hand against her forehead.]

I remember differently. Orzammar is a thing of the distant past. We've defeated the Blight and gone our separate ways. You stayed in Denerim for a time, and I... traveled elsewhere. On my own.

[Possibly the vaguest way to explain it, but that should be enough information.]

Oh. Huh.

[Okay, weird magic, but not the Fade...? Sure. Maybe. Just as she's trying to accept that, though, the second part she actually cares about comes along.]

Wait! You left after the Blight? We killed the dragon and everybody's cool? Oh, shit.

[That's-- that's a lot to take in, uhhh, oh shit.]

Where'd you go? You thought this was that maybe? I mean, you're allowed to run around if you want, but you're coming back, yeah?

[It's the dog that brings Shepard to where Amdir is. She sees him prancing through the grass, carefree, and she observes him, content to keep walking- but the dog spots her and, with a determination in his eyes she wasn't expecting, comes bounding up to her, barking and circling until she gets the hint. So she follows him and he leads her into the vegetation right up to his owner- and Shepard watches skeptically as she sees the worlds Biggest Baby roll around in the dirt.]

Hey there. You all right?

[As soon as Barkspawn reappears, he circles over her on the floor as Amdir surveys... whoever he brought. A shemlen, Barkspawn? Really? Just because she's slept with one doesn't make them all okay, buddy!

She looks up at Shepard with a glare, wanting to say something back, but right then Barkspawn gives her face a big lick. She opens her mouth as if to yell, but no sound comes out-- followed by a lip motion that looks distinctly like 'fuck' as she wipes her face off.

Looking back to Shepard, Amdir gives a shooing motion, as if she's some kind of unruly bird. Or Alistair.]

[Shepard watches critically as this elf, clearly an elf now that she knows what those are, tries to shoo her away. Her dog seems very friendly though, which is nice, as he bounds back to her again and asks for pets. She obliges and looks back to the elf.]

The name's Shepard. Commander Shepard. Looks like you ran afoul of some plants here on... dream Ziziphus. Are you naturally mute or was it some magic thing?

[Absolutely an elf. Her hair might be braided to cover her ears, but all the movement makes it plainly obvious. Meanwhile, she squints like the other woman is an absolute idiot, even though she's the one on the floor silently yelling.

She shakes her head at the first bit, pointing towards the flowers and giving them a good glare, and then points to her throat, pantomiming a cough. That's as much as she's going to explain, and even that's more than she wants to give, so that'll have to be good enough.

Amdir thinks for a moment, and then swings a knife off her belt, looking like she's concentrating hard. What was that symbol again?

She draws a question mark in the ground. She wants to ask where this is, what it's name is, but written words are hard and she isn't good at them. Heck.]

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TEST DRIVE MEME ( 011 )

warden amdir tabris | dragon age

dragonna suck

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You're pollen my leg!

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